Tag Archive: the haven of rcs


One billion rising

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Genital mutilation because women do not need to feel pleasure during sex.

Domestic Violence because a woman should know her place.

Human Trafficking because women are just there for men’s pleasure and to work.

Forced labor because that’s what women are supoose to do while the men lead them.

Forced capture because women don’t need to do anythigjn but have babies, take care of the babies, and take care of their man.

Mysogyny because women are not as good as men

Force wage discrimination because a woman does not worth as much as men.

Sexism because women are seen as mere objects, not living human beings.

Rape because women are only here for a man’s pleasure.

These are the pervasive beliefs around the world towards the female gender.

The same gender that populates more of the world by 2%.

The same gender that creates life.

The same gender that has been creating what every one of us craves since the beginning of time (no matter what else she does) – A Home.

The same gender that gets recognized on poster boards, lips, and screams every time a camera is at a sports event or in a crowd.

The same gender that has fought for equality for their entire existence.

The same gender that has uplifted every single one of us.

ibWhy is this acceptable?  It’s not!

On February 14th, world wide, billions of men and women will stand up, dance, and speak out and say in one unified voice…

NO! WE will not stand for this violence against women anymore.

Violence against women will end…NOW!

All Violence(verbal, mental, physical, sexual) against women must end!

 

Go to this link.  One billion rising is an organization dedicated to stopping worldwide violence agasisnt women. This organization was created by Eve Ensler, a advocatre against gender violence, writer, poet, and creator of The Vagina Monologues. Do something. Learn the dance, make a video, start a march, a campaign, whatever….we must do something!  Become part of the one billion rising movement.

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It is very hard to truly understand why abuse victims do not want to be on the stand to put their abusers in jail, but that doesn’t mean that shouldn’t be able to stand up for themselves in some other way.

What we as a people have to understand is the power of intimidation and fear.

We all know our family’s gestures and idiosyncrasies. You know for a fact that when your brother or sister twitches their eye, they are being disproving and mean…though nobody else would. You know that when your mom is pissed off, no matter what her voice sounds like, her nose flares out and that means when she is done being polite you’re going to get it. These are things we just know from hanging around and being part of these people’s lives for so long.

The same is true for victims of abuse. No matter what the judge, the lawyers, and the other people around see the victim sees those little things that tells them volumes of consequences that will happen to them if they do anything wrong. One woman routinely got thrown around the house, through windows, and beat with a hammer and before this happened, her abuser took a deep breath, sighed and shook his head. This was a pattern. With this kind of violence…if a person is on the stand and the abuser does this….the person has no ability to fight this mental abuse and post traumatic feelings. When her abuser did this little gesture in court…she froze. She couldn’t talk and the fear consumed her.

This is why this law is so amazing.

This is why this law can help so many people. This law can change the outcomes of hundreds and possibly thousands of cases per year. But what if your area doesn’t have this law….Florida creating it sets a precedence. Because it has already been ok’d by one state, it can now be ok’d by other states.

We are advocates of social change and this is the step in the right direction.

Opt4 more laws like this one.

opt 4 abusers being held to their crimes.

opt 4 seeing that men can be abused and just as frightened.

 

 

 

   There is an old saying that says: An ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure.

The funny part about this statement is how truly easy education and prevention truly are.  All we have to do…ALL WE HAVE TO DO….is start talking, it’s truly and really just that easy.

If we begin talking to a 4 year old what nonviolence looks like (of course we’d use words she’d be able to understand)  she could kind of tell us. So we begin a conversation that lasts days, weeks, months, years, and then it continues with every adult she knows or comes in contact with….she would be more likely to understand, believe, and be part of the belief that nonviolence is an obvious solution.  What would this be….Prevention.

So where is the education part…..every moment you talk about what is right and wrong, you are educating! We must get out of this idea that education only happens in a school…we are educating every person around us with our actions, words, and things we talk about every moment of every day.  We must educate our young people especially about the need to end this epidemic of domestic violence.

An article about the domestic violence happening here in Florida by a Tampa Bay times writer Keyonna Summers talks about this need for prevention and education.

In a time where “an explosion in the number of domestic-related homicides, stalking and other violent behavior across the state [of Florida] since 2009” is happening. “The agency[Florida coalition Against Domestic Violence] also has noticed an uptick in murder-suicides reported by Florida media in the last year” , it shows the desperate need we have for prevention and education NOW more than ever.

Ms. summers interviewed many leaders of the domestic violence prevention world and their quotes are indicative of this need as well.

“What people will often say is they didn’t know what to do. They didn’t realize that someone being controlling or doing a lot of psychological abuse was just as harmful as the physical abuse and could lead to homicide just as physical violence could,” said Frieda Widera, a victim advocate at the Largo Police Department and chairwoman of the task force’s fatality review team.

“What that says to us is we need to provide more education, that the community needs to understand, not just the system,” she said. “The only way we’re going to end domestic homicide is if friends and family and co-workers and neighbors know how to recognize it and intervene.”

It keeps coming back again and again, we need more education…not just for students….for adults as well. It is shocking to walk into a room of 80-100 adults and watch their faces contort in surprise when we speak to them about what Domestic violence is, what abuse really is, and what is happening all around them. Many people put on blinders when it comes to domestic violence and lull themselves into a cocoon of ignorance truly believing that this is not happening, and the lives they live is not part of this problem.

Of course, our future….the kids, the students…they need this education as well. Because these same adults who are so surprised and shocked to find out these statistics are the same ones that are parenting and educating our children.

So we have to reach out and “teach lessons about healthy relationships to middle school-age boys and even children as young as preschool age.”

“Said Widera: “It’s planting the seeds for a new generation that won’t even consider domestic violence to be possible.”

We, the community, the group of bystanders, the men and women of the world must do as the Haven of RCS is doing and “giving free informational pamphlets and presentations to agencies and businesses, including hairstylists, dental offices and doctors, who sometimes deny that the problem affects their clientele.

The sessions train the professionals to recognize things like cuts to the scalp, broken dentures, canceled appointments or even unnecessary supervision by clients’ partners as possible symptoms of abuse.

“There’s still that stigma that it only happens to certain women and that it’s not as prevalent as it is,” said Courtney Hendrickson, Pinellas task force vice chairwoman and Haven outreach coordinator. “But it’s not one race, one culture, one socioeconomic class. It’s everyone.”

Yes, Keyonna Summers Tampa Bay times writer, it is happening to everyone.

We must begin educating everyone.  We must all be advocates for social change to end this abuse.

We must all end this destruction of people everywhere.

We can end this and it will only come about through prevention and education!

 

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